The Return: Midnight Chapter 40

solely after an endless time in the soft, material body darkness, roughthing was forcing Elena back up into light. Real light.Not the terrible commonality half-light of the Tree. correct through shut eyelids she could involve it, feel its heat. A yel ow sun. Where was she? She couldnt remember.And she didnt c ar. Something was studying wrong her that the gentle darkness was better. moreover then she remembered a name.Stefan.Stefan was?Stefan was the iodin whothe one she sockd. But hed never mum that love was not singular. Hed never understood that she could be in love with Damon and that it would never change an atoms worth of her love for him. Or that his lack of understanding had been so wrenching and painful that she had mat torn into two different people at times.But now, until now before she opened her eyes, she realized that she was drinking. She was drinking the blood of a lamia, and that lamia wasnt Stefan. There was something unique in this blood. It was deepe r and spicier and more heavy, al at once.She couldnt table service opening her eyes. For some reason she didnt understand, they flew open and she tried and true immediately to focalise on the scent and feeling and color of whoever was bending over her, memory her.She couldnt understand, either, her sense of letdown when she slowly realized that it was Sage leaning over her, belongings her gently hardly securely to his bang, with his bronze chest bare and immediate from the sunlight.But she was lying down flat, on grass, from what her turn overs could feeland for some reason her foreman was cold. Very cold.Cold and wet.She stopped drinking and tried to sit up. The light grip became firmer. She apprehendd Sages voice say, and felt the gang fight in his chest as he said it, Ma pauvre petite, you moldinessiness drink more in a moment or so. And your pig has Stillsome of the ashes in it.Ashes? Ashes? Didnt you put ashes on your head fornow what had she been thinking well-nig h? It was as if there was a block in her mind, keeping her from matureting close tosomething. But she wasnt going to be told what to do.Elena sat up.She was in yes, she was truly sure the kitsune paradise, and until a moment ago her body had been arched back, so that her hair had been in the clear little stream that she had seen earlier. Stefan and Bonnie had been swear out something pitch-black out of her hair. They both were s muck upged with black as well Stefan had a big swath across one cheekbone, and Bonnie had light(a) fair-haired(a) streaks below her eyes.Crying. Bonnie had been crying. She was Stillcrying, in little sobs that she was trying to suppress. And now that Elena go throughed harder she could see that Stefans eyelids were swol en and that he had been crying too.Elenas lips were numb. She fel back onto the grass, looking up at Sage, who was wiping his eyes furtively. Her throat ached, not just inside, where sobbing and gasping might moderate it hurt, hard ly outside, too. She had a picture of herself slashing at her own neck with a knife.Through her numb lips, she whispered, Am I a vampire?Pas encore,Sage said unsteadily. Not yet. But Stefan and I, we both had to give you monumental amounts of blood. You must be very careful in the next days. You are right on the brink.That explained how she felt. Probably Damon was hoping that she would become one, wicked boy. Instinctively, she held out her hand to Stefan. Maybe she could help him.We just wont do anything for a little while,she said. You dont take a leak to be sad.But she herself Stillfelt very wrong. She hadnt felt this wrong since shed seen Stefan in prison house and had thought process that he would die at any moment.Noit was worsebecause with Stefan there had been hope and Elena had the feeling that now hope was gone.Everything was gone. She was hol ow a lady friend who looked solid, but whose insides were missing.Im dying,she whispered. I know itAre you al going to say goo d-bye now?And with that Sage Sage choked up and began to sob.Stefan, Stilllooking so oddly mussed, with those traces of soot on his face and arms and his hair and habiliments soaking wet, said, Elena, youre not going to die. Not unless you choose to.She had never seen Stefan look like this before. Not even in prison. His flame, his inner fire that he showed to almost no one but Elena, had gone out.Sage save us,he said, slowly careful y, as if it cost him great trial to let the cat out of the bag. The ash that was fal ing you and Bonnie would have died if youd had to breathe any more of it. But Sage put a door back to the Gatehouse right in front of us. I could barely see it my eyes were so ful of ashfal , and its whole getting worse on that moon.Ashfal ,Elena whispered. There was something at the bottom of her mind, but once again her memory failed her. It was almost as if shed been Influenced to not remember. But that was ridiculous.Why were ashes fal ing?she asked, realizi ng that her voice was husky, hoarse as if shed cheered too long at a footbal game.You used Wings of Destruction,Stefan said steadily, looking at her with his swol en eyes. You saved our lives. But you kil ed the Tree and the angiotensin-converting enzyme bal disintegrated.Wings of Destruction. She must have lost her temper. And shed kil ed a world. She was a murderer.And now the star bal was lost. Fel s Church. Oh, God. What would Damon say to her? Elena had done everything everything wrong. Bonnie was sobbing now, her face off away.Im sorry,Elena said, knowing how inadequate this was. For the first time she looked around miserably. Damon?she whispered. He wont speak to me? Because of what I did?Sage and Stefan looked at each other.Ice went down Elenas spine.She started to get up, but her legs werent the legs she remembered. They wanted to unlock at the knees. She was staring down at herself, at her own wet and smudged clothes and then something like mud came down her forehead.M ud or congealing blood.Bonnie made a wholesome. She was Stillsobbing, but she was speaking, too, in a new husky voice that made her sound much older. Elena we didnt get the ashes out of the top of your hair. Sage had to give you an pinch transfusion.Il get the ashes out,Elena said flatly. She let her knees bend. She fel onto them, jarring her body. Then, twisting, she leaned down to the little project and let her head fal forward.Through the icy shock she could dimly hear exclamations from the people above water, and Stefans sharp, Elena, are you All right? in her head.No, she thought back. But Im not drowning, either. Im washing out my hair. Maybe Damon will at least see me if Im presentable. Maybe hell come with us and fight for Fells Church. permit me help you up, Stefan sent quietly.Elena had come to the end of her air. She pul ed her heavy head out of the water and flipped it, soaking but clean, so that it fel down her back. She stared at Stefan.Why?she said and then, with a sudden panic Has he left-hand(a) already? Was he angrywith me?Stefan.It was Sage, speaking tiredly. Stefan, who was staring out of his green eyes like a hunted animal, made some faint sound.The Influence, it is not working,Sage said. She will remember on her own.